The Power of Labels

Assigning labels and stereotypes is harmful in so many ways; it makes a person loose sight of who they strive to be and in turn, are moulded as others wish to see them. We try so hard to live up to these expectation and fit these labels, forgetting that it doesn't really matter how outsiders see you- people who are truly close to you, will know that you are much more than just intelligent, charming, sarcastic, fit, geeky, beautiful. You are not just ONE thing. 

Labelling starts during our pre-teens; young children don't care about how you look, they play and talk to everyone the same. The exclusion develops as we are exposed to media, the underrepresentation of certain groups and the bullying that arises from it. It's easier to fit a certain mould and stay stuck, than trying to step out of it and suffer alienation.

We tell kids that they should be inclusive, not judge others by how they look, but stereotyping is very much present in adulthood. Most of us don't fully understand what it means to be kind, regardless of there being something in it for us. We forget that we are allowed and can have more than one layer to our being. Those moments of ignorance, that's what the young adolescent mind hears and the cycle begins again. 

To me, it's simple. People are different. I, for example, would be described as a girly girl: likes getting dolled up, cares about their appearance and may not be the brightest or most athletic girl around. WRONG, as I may fit into some of those descriptions- I, like everyone else, am so much more. 

I do not like sports, I hated most of grade nine gym. I do care about my appearance, not because I'll get complimented but because getting dolled up and doing my hair nicely is something I do for myself. I don't need my "other face" to go out, because I feel just as confident without it. I dislike romantic movies, I enjoy a good horror film and anything Tim Burton, Superhero, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings and Star Wars -esque. I watch anime, Doctor Who, Jane the Virgin, Shadowhunters and How to get Away with Murder. I love reading, writing, dancing and learning new things. I am and like many things- some may fit with how I look, others may really surprise you but it doesn't matter. I strive to be a good person, I try to spread kindness and that's all anyone should care about. 

Labels are unnecessary, they have no use in our society. We should care about people's actions toward becoming a good human being. We should look for and encourage random acts of kindness and empathy- how you look, talk or do things don't matter. 

You are an intricate being, don't limit yourself to please others.

xo,

Natalie 

My Favourite Series of 2015

Anyone who says "there is nothing to watch" needs to reevaluate their choices of words, because nowadays you can find something for absolutely everyone (there's a channel for DOGS). With school and work, my screen time has decreased and I've switched to the wonders of Netflix and watching shows online- I've watched a lot of shows, some didn't last past the first 20 minutes and others have consumed my whole life (no regrets).

Here is my 2015 Must Watch List (not in any particular order): 

1. Gotham (2014) | If you are a fan of all things Batman, then you'll love this dark show. This very thrilling series, showcases many of the beloved Batman characters: Catwomen, Penguin, Bruce Wayne and Commissioner Gordon- all the big names get their much needed origin story and interesting side stories in this series. This superhero, crime, mobster show is a definite MUST WATCH! 
2. Jane The Virgin (2014) | This series is the novela for the modern day Latina- it's exactly what you wish your Abuela had been watching all along. Smart, representative of the hispanic community and funny; this show makes you feel all sorts of emotions. Gina Rodriguez is my hero and the whole concept is refreshing to see. Finally, a series I can relate to and it's great! 
3. Hannibal (2013) | Dark, gory, psychological horror series- this is a psychology students dream! As a fan of Silence of the Lamb, this thrilling show was everything I could have expected and more- I couldn't believe I hadn't watched it before. The mind games, imagery and relationships illustrated in the series is beyond imaginative, it's a shame that this show has come to it's end. I've just started season two, so I have many more episodes to psychoanalyze. 
4. Jessica Jones (2015) | Hip, hip, hooray for the realistic portrayal of a woman with super powers. If you have had it with skin tight outfits, goody toe-shoes personality and dependent roles in Marvel women, then this brand NEW series is exactly what you've been waiting for. Also, the magnificent David Tennant is in this show and well..he's the Doctor! You have to love this show on that point solely. 

Have you watched any or all of these? Agree or Disagree? What series are on your 2015 must watch list? 

xoxo, 

Natalie

How to Handle Criticism

How something makes you feel is up to you. You have the power to let things go and ignore or listen and open up to all kinds of comments. I've doubted myself many times and needed reassurance every step of the way, but if there are three things I've learned about criticism, it's that: 

1. The comment may sting a little, it may make you feel insecure about yourself and it might piss you off but just cool down and be proactive. Don't react, think!
2. Is it Helpful or Hurtful? Can you use this new information to become a better version of yourself? Should you just ignore it, not take it to heart and smile?
3. You might not like it, it may have been purposely hurtful and your ego is hurt but every comment can only help you become a better person. Criticism, growth requires it. 

Free yourself of the insecurities and know that your heart is in the right place. As you continue to move forward, there will always be people who have something to say, judge and criticize. 

I am a control freak and need to realize that I can't control everything; people aren't always going to like you, things aren't always going to go your way and someone will always be better at something than you. And that's ok.

xoxo, 

Natalie 

Disney Princess: Role Model or Nightmare?

When did liking the Disney Princess movies become detrimental to your feminist status? It's just a movie, at face value it may not have many valid lessons but let's look a little deeper than simple- Princess needs Prince. Here are a few Princesses and the messages that I think they share: 

Belle (Beauty & The Beast) | Selfless, righteous and smart, this Princess is one of my favourites. One of the only characters (in early Disney movies) challenging gender roles, Belle is a bookworm and weirdo who doesn't care for regular norms. This princess selflessly trades her freedom for her fathers, staying in a creepy castle with a Beast (which she doesn't know is actually a Prince) not knowing what fate will bring. She single-handedly saves the Beast and though he has a temper, horrible etiquette and looks like a weird buffalo, wolf- she's able to get through to him with kindness and patience. 

Cinderella (Cinderella) | Kind and forgiving, this Princess is the epitome of the saying " turn the other cheek". Having lost her family, being treated like a slave and only having mice as friends- if that's not a recipe for losing your mind, what is? By being brave, staying hopeful and only seeing the good in those around her- she finds her happy ending, not the Prince but her courage to finally remove herself from an unhealthy situation and forgive those who did her wrong. 

Snow White (Snow White) | As one of the first Disney Princesses, this character does not have much depth but if one thing can be said about this loveable character is that she's trusting. Keeping her innocence alive, she trustingly takes refuge with seven little men and accepts food from a creepy ass lady, like really? Maybe this is not the best message, but if some good could come from this movie is that you cannot focus on the bad in people; you have to have a little faith that people are innately kind and giving. 

Ariel (The Little Mermaid) | Troublesome and curious, this Princess is known for making less than ideal life choices but nonetheless is part of one of my favourite movies. Ariel is a character that's going through growth, she thinks she knows what's best and the only thing on her mind is exploring the world. Yeah, she may have Prince in the brain but don't all teen girls? This princess is a symbol of growing up, making mistakes and figuring it out along the way. 

Thought? Agree or disagree. 

xoxo, 

Natalie 

Bad Day or Wake Up Call?

Do you ever have a really bad day?  Not only did you get your period, but you feel like you are getting sick. All your plans and everything that you had hoped, just came crumbling down.  Well, that day was today for me and it sucks! 

The perfectly outlined plan that I had made is no more- I'm stranded between a "I told you so" and "you should of known better". The hormones don't help because as someone who hates to cry, I've been feeling like yelling and crying all day. I may feel like giving up and just curling up, I'm probably more in debt now than I started but I will figure it out and I'm not alone. 

I feel like crap and my throat still hurts, but today is just one day of many. It always gets better, even if its just one day of many crappy days- there is always a silver lining. It gets you thinking about how if this is my worst day, than I must of had a lot of good in my life, this isn't a tragedy or a loss but a fallen branch on my path. 

I may be freaking out and it may seem like the end, but it's not. Everything is going to be different, I'm going to have to come up with a new plan and that's ok. I'll have to try new things and blindly enter the unknown, but it was going to happen anyway. I might wake up with no voice tomorrow, but I'll still have a roof over my head and food in my belly. 

I may be having a crappy day, but I am still blessed and have lots of things to be thankful for. I have to step back and put things into perspective, this isn't the worst day ever- this is a wake up call and I better answer it. 

xoxo, 

Natalie 

Why Cruelty-Free?

There are a lot of people, who question why I pay extra money for a product, just because it is "cruelty-free". They say that I'm not vegan or vegetarian, and that I'm wasting my money when I could get the same product, for A LOT cheaper. All of this is very true, I am not vegan- I eat red meat, bake with eggs and drink dairy milk but I will ALWAYS buy products with the cute little Peta bunny logo. 

I firmly believe that testing on animals is cruel and unnecessary. We have all the information we need to keep creating innovative products, without hurting other living beings- who feel pain, just like we do. I think that the problem, is not the fact that we eat other animals because Lions and Chimpanzees do too, but how they are treated in the process. We claim to be the smartest organism in the world, yet we are the cause for its destruction and continue to not care. 

I try to do my part in making the world a better place; I talk about animal conservation and I choose to use cruelty-free products- it may not be as impactful as Peta, Green Peace or World Wildlife Fund, but I am creating a ripple towards change. Here are some of my favourite, cruelty-free companies: 

• Tarte Cosmetics | Found at any Sephora
• Smashbox Cosmetics | Found at any Sephora and select Shoppers Drug Mart 
• NYX Los Angeles Inc. | Found at select Rexall Pharmacy and Shoppers Drug Mart
• Urban Decay | Found at any Sephora and select Shoppers Drug Mart

Did I miss any of your favourite? What cruelty-free product do you recommend? 

xoxo, 

Natalie 

Meditation Challenge

“Yoga is the settling of the mind into silence. When the mind has settled, we are established in our essential nature, which is unbounded consciousness. Our essential nature is usually overshadowed by the activity of the mind.” -Patanjali

My Practice is Stillness | Day 1: I didn't know what to expect when I decided to take this challenge, aside from a casual yoga practice, I've never meditated or done anything like this before. I'm the type of person, who in savasana is twitching- my body and mind are accustomed to constant thought and motion. 

The challenge 

Sit comfortably and watch the space between the eyebrows. Don’t try to see anything, just watch. Remain unconcerned with your thoughts. Remember, you can’t stop thinking by thinking. When the mind wanders, don’t make a big deal of it, just observe your thoughts. This can be practiced for 5-10 minutes. If you practice regularly, you will cultivate more peace and greater intuition through the practice of silence.

I listened to the audio "seed" and found that it was very helpful- there was a voice and visualization that I could focus on. My whole body was twitching near the end, but I tried not to move and I wasn't uncomfortable so there was no need to. I look forward to the rest of the journey, this exercise was a great first step to a more mindful and peaceful living.  
   

“Worthiness, or unworthiness, is something that is pronounced upon you by you. You are the only one that can deem yourself worthy or unworthy. You are the only one who can love yourself into a state of allowing, or hate yourself in a state of disallowing. There is not something wrong with you, nor is there something wrong with one who is not loving you. You are all just, in the moment, practicing the art of not allowing, or the art of resisting.” -Abraham Hicks

My Practice is Worthiness | Day 2: Who am I? What defines who I am? I am made up of layers; I am a physical self, intellectual self and spiritual self- but is that who I really am? Or are all of these layers just a reflection of my true self- a self made up of the potential for unconditional love. 

The challenge 

Write down three areas of your life where you have experienced a feeling of unworthiness. Perhaps you didn’t think you were good looking enough, or maybe you weren’t a good enough mother, it can be anything. The first thing I would like you to do is a brief reflection to see if you know where these thoughts are coming from. You might know, you might not know. Just take a moment for contemplation. If something comes up for you, write it down and move on.

Today's meditation was insightful and thought provoking, it made me question; what defines who a person is, do those characteristics really make up a person or are they a reflection of one's true self? In my opinion, we are many things and we have many faces that we present to the world, we are not defined by one thing. 

"May I be peaceful.

May I be at ease.

May I be filled with loving-kindness.

May I be free." -Buddhist Metta Meditation

My Practice is Nurturing | Day 2: Self-love, compassion and care should be something that everyone incorporates into their day life. There shouldn't be a stigmatization, when a person focuses on taking care of themselves before others- one must be at ease with themselves to fully and whole heartedly care for others. 

The challenge 

Close your eyes. Take three deep, long breaths. What practices or rituals can you perform to bring reverence and self-love to truly embrace yourself? 

Mantra's and Mudras, why haven't I done this before? What a powerful moment to have the garuda, or angel wings over the heart, mudra and recite a mantra to myself, loved ones, community and the world! It's only been two days and I feel lighter and happier. 

“Just as you wouldn’t leave the house without taking a shower, you shouldn’t start the day without at least 10 minutes of sacred practice: prayer, meditation, inspirational reading.” -Marianne Williamson

My Practice is Devotion | Day 3: It's been an interesting couple of days; though I have only done four exercises and guided meditations, I feel as if it's something that has been part of my routine for a while. I start my day with a little enlightenment and feel focused, at ease and rested for the whole day. 

The challenge 

Say a prayer to your inner guide, or your higher power. Ask to let-go of what you think you need and surrender to your highest good, to your highest purpose. Sit in silence and listen. Jot a few notes down of what may arise for you in this moment.

In today's "seed", tantra's were incorporated- which are practices meant to channel a greater purpose or being. I found that the song was calming, even though my mind wandered a few times and I couldn't understand what was being said, the vibrations of the sound felt like they traveled into my inner being. 

“Fearlessness is the first rung on the ladder of freedom.” -Swami Rama

My Practice is Courage | Day 4: What are limitations? Who decides that we can't or won't be able to do? The power is in our hands, we set our own limits, we create shortcomings.

The challenge 

What would your life look like if you were fearless? How would it feel to overcome your inner voice that says “no”? Visualize this life of courage and write down what you see and feel. Be specific. Remember, to be effective, this meditation must be practiced with faith and without doubt.

Today's short meditation incorporated visualization- I visualized that I was in a rainforest as it's getting dark, I'm trying to get home, when I'm faced with a snake in my path. The snake, represents the limitation or fear we have in our lives- what we don't realize is that unless we face this obstacle, we won't be able to find out that this "snake" is actually just rope on a branch. It doesn't exist, it's just a figment of our imagination-fear. 

“Peace Begins With Me. Truth Begins With Me. It doesn’t exist out there. It exists in here."

My Practice is Independence | Day 4: When will you take charge? Stop looking outwards for answers, look within yourself and trust that you are enough to lead your life in your own way. 

The challenge 

You are the guru. In embodying this, you must know and embody your own truth. After you practice this Independence meditation, and repeat the mantra “Peace begins with me, Truth begins with me” over and over, make the following declaration:  

My truth is _____________________. Keep it simple. First thought. This is your truth.

Independence means finding truth and peace within yourself. The act of not needing others to tell you what you need to do or be- I am in charge of my own outcome and I know what is best for me. Realizing that you have so much control over something, that was thought to be unavoidable, is a blessing in disguise. 

“I measure my success on how much fun I’m having!” -Gabrielle Bernstein

My Practice is Playful | Day 5: Lighthearted, full of wonder and fun..when did we lose these feelings and grow up? Why does being adults, mean we can no longer be playful? 

The challenge 

A child’s capacity for joy is enormous! Children are oozing curiosity, creativity and happiness. On the following pages, ask yourself:
• What are your favourite qualities in children that you wished you still embodied?
• How can you intentionally bring these favourite qualities into your own daily life?
• What would you need to do to make this happen?

Imagining that I was a child; running around, smiling and not having a care in the world- brings to my attention that so much has changed since then. My life consists of a constant "what's next" and living up to expectations. There is a permanent sense of worry, that I carry all the time- feeling wonder and having fun, that may just be what happiness is all about so why am I not concerned with that? 

“A garden requires patient labor and attention. Plants do not grow merely to satisfy ambitions or to fulfill good intentions. They thrive because someone expended effort on them.” -Liberty Hyde Bailey

My Practice is Thriving | Day 5: The power of the mind, can you manifest your dreams into reality? Have you tried?

The challenge 

Listen to this meditation twice a week. When the meditation has finished, sit up and write down three things you can do until the next practice that will support your vision. Commit to this practice for thirty days. At the end of thirty days notice if you are bringing your dream to life. It really is all about thriving and cultivating your vision!

The mind is powerful! Through visualization, we can manifest our thoughts into reality- the good and the bad. By taking the time to imagine the life I desire, I am creating a guide towards achieving it; I know what I want, I can see it in my mind and I know how to get there. 

“Joy is what happens to us when we allow ourselves to recognize how 

good things really are.” -Marianne Williamson

My Practice is Joy | Day 6: We don't always have to be happy and put together, but we do need to know that these feelings come from within us. All we have to do is think about the things that make us feel joy, and watch as it radiates through your body. 

The challenge 

Write 100 things that bring you joy. This is going to elevate your cellular structure; I promise! You are going to be sky high on joy! Next, circle the top 10 which are super easy for you to do in your life. Now write down how you can incorporate these 10 that bring you joy into your week.

As human beings, we like to complicate everything! What I have learned the past six days, is that we have so much control over our lives, emotions and outcomes. We are not bystanders in this life- I can choose to forgive and let go, and welcome joy and lightheartedness into my life. 

   

“Everyday grace must be your reality, your norm.” -Yogi Bhajan

My Practice is Grace | Day 6: Grace is the love, light and kindness within us. 

The challenge 

In my everyday life, I need to _______________ in order to be open to grace. My commitment is to be open to grace. I am going to _______________ once every ________________ to open this space to grace for myself. When I am open to grace, I feel ____________________.

Though I didn't get much out of this particular meditation, I liked the incorporation of chakras- which are the centres of spiritual power in the human body. In total we have 7, my favourite and the one that resides the most with me is the 6th chakra- the third eye, the centre of intuition. 

    

“As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.” -John Fitzgerald Kennedy

My Practice is Gratitude | Day 7: Being grateful, showing gratitude and giving thanks is something so simple, yet we all tend to ignore these acts. Sometimes, we have been blessed with so much wealth- material and spiritual, that we feel entitled instead of gratitude.  

The challenge 

From now on, every time you sit down for a meal with friends ask everyone at the table to share three things they are grateful for. It is truly an amazing practice that is easily maintained. As long as you are eating food, you are practicing gratitude. Such an inspiring way to experience the power of gratitude!

In the coming months, I hope to keep a weekly meditation practice in my routine. Through this experience, I have been able to see things in a different light and feel a sense of ease- I have let go of negativity, trying to find the good in any situation. Gratitude, Worthiness, Playful & Courage - these are all messages and ways of life that I hope to incorporate daily. 

xoxo, 

Natalie